Sometimes, no matter how much we want to be able to say the right thing, the words don't come. And so often, even though someone we know is hurting, we tend to be silent because nothing seems good enough. Because truly, sometimes there are no words. Sometimes nothing is good enough. Unfortunately, I've found myself in this situation more than once in my life. And unfortunately, remaining silent doesn't take away the other person's pain either.
One very early morning in July, I drove into town to get a long run in. The sun hadn't even made an appearance, but as I was locking the car, I heard my name. Amy and I talked for a bit and she shared some good news with me. She was expecting her fourth child. JOY!
Slightly past the halfway point of her pregnancy, Amy contracted listeria while traveling and became very ill. She lost that precious little baby. When I heard the news, I cried. During the days that followed, I couldn't stop thinking of this sweet woman, and how she must be suffering. Having had a miscarriage, I know that emotional healing doesn't come easy. I prayed. Several times a day. I wanted her to know how sorry I was, but what could I say? "I'm sorry" seemed trite, and not enough, but truth be told nothing could ease the pain.
As thoughts of Amy and her tiny baby popped into my head every day I began thinking about a quilt. I wanted to give her something to hold onto during the difficult days and nights. Something tangible to say, "His life mattered. I know you loved him, and his life was precious, no matter how brief."
I haven't been sewing much, but as I prayed for this hurting mother, inspiration set in. A log cabin design was chosen because we build our lives around our family. Red was used as the center to represent the love between a mother and her child. Blue because Jack was a boy. And because she's mourning. And yellow. The color of hope and of joy. No matter that this little boy only lived inside his mother's womb he was loved, he was special, and brought joy.
And there is hope that someday Amy will be reunited with this wee one. She'll hold him again and her tears will be no more.
Bits and pieces. Nothing purchased. Plenty of love, and prayers.
I delivered it yesterday, and I'm still praying.